2001

While WACOFF amazingly escaped the rain bullet this year (Sunday's spit didn't count, despite the premature rush to rainsuits on the part of unnamed players), we could not escape the Coughenour cruise missile as Brother Glenn led Team Blanc to an impressive (Wind? What wind?) victory in the 2001 Invitational.  The -7 performance was an unprecedented third straight victory for Captain Glenn.  A truly remarkable feat and attributable in no small part to Doctor Glenn's ability to monitor and maintain his team's alcohol intake over a 5 hour event.  Well done, Team Blanc.  Preserve and protect that trophy, as it is bigger than all of us. 

That annoying (and annoyed) loud noise you hear is the sound of grinding teeth emanating from Detroit and Chicago.  The suggestion has been made that in order to allow the pack of "A" players who have yet to win a Scramble Championship any chance to break the Coughenour dynasty, The Golf Committee will need to put Bretz, Nielsen, Brown and Stimson all on one team.  OK, but who gets to be captain?

Congratulations also go to:

Mickey Ball winners (Bretz, Lord, Pruss and Baran) in a tough competition. The Committee wishes to thank all the Captains for their dignified and gracious understanding and acceptance of and willing compliance with the 5 minute search rule.  Roberto Vincenzo would have been proud.  

Flight Championship Winners on Sunday:

A: John Stimson     85/71 (tie with James C w/ tie breaker going to John based on 18th hole par)

B:  Randy Moss      86/71 (Watch out, Moss is angling for an A spot)

C:  Jerry Snyder     82/58  (The Golf Committee is not infallible, and this is Exhibit A.  Get ready to play up Jerry. Great round.)

D:  Tim Guerriero   94/67  (Given time, a monkee with a piano will eventually play a little Beethoven.  Tim sends his apologies to all who found him insufferable in the wake)

Paramutual Winners were John Stimson (AB) and Jerry Snyder (CD).

If you think you are owed skin money or paramutual money because you left early, think again.  In the view of some of the more malevolent members of The Committee, you actually should be deprived since you were too damn anxious to leave before the event concluded. Cooler heads have prevailed (at least for now) and you can collect your winnings if you call or write Paul Coughenour.

The Committee once again thanks all who made the event possible and enjoyable, including Dennis Holefca on food, David Hardesty and John Stimson on The Archive (if any of you find those cameras we gave out, please return them to David Hardesty for posterity), Barry Goldman on spirituality, David Hardesty on The Bar, Marshal Hyman on the competition prizes, Dennis Donahue and Dan Bretz on skins, Skip Pruss and John Stimson on matters sartorial, Ron Hardesty and Joe Mantey on Friday paramutual and to James Coughenour for stepping in and saving the Sunday paramutual from neglect and abandonment.  A big hug to Paul Coughenour, our Golf Chairman, for his continued hard work, inspiration and support of all that is special about WACOFF.  UDAMAN!

In other noteworthy events, Chuck Brown gets the Bretz Rules Trophy for his discerning and erudite dissertation on the unplayable lie rule.  Ron Hardesty gets the Diarrhea of the Mouth Award for the 729 e-mails regarding the Friday paramutuel.  Skip Pruss and Joe Mantey get the Navigator Award for being alone amongst the group to not find their way to Mistwood on Sunday on time. Jerry Snyder gets Sandbagger of the Decade (duh!). Team Vulcan gets the Ugliest Shirt Color Award (very tough competition this year).  Guerriero gets the Do As I Say, Not As I Say award for moving up the tee times on Friday in spite of all printed instructions to the contrary.  And last, but not least, Randy Moss gets the Golfers Anonymous Award (hello, my name is Randy and I am a golfer) for getting up at 7am Friday morning to play golf, looking out the window and deciding to go back to bed.  Huge leap forward in Randy's therapy.  Now, if only Nielsen and Stimson could admit they have a disease and seek help.  The Committee is pleased to accept further award nominations as the WACOFF's may deem fit.

Next year brings what next year brings, but if anyone has ideas, suggestions, comments, complaints or offers of invaluable and inspired assistance, please let The Committee know, preferably in writing.  Unlike other dictatorships, The Committee occasionally seeks the views of the masses and sometimes finds its collective muse in the voice of the proletariat.  

As of this writing, WACOFF 2002 will return to Northport, September 6-8, 2002 unless the mood (or composition) of The Committee changes.  See you then.  Don't be late.

Yr.Obt Svts

THE COMMITTEE